WorldSave

WorldSave has been more or less off-line the past 12 days.  You have my apologies.  It appears that my second laziness trial hijacked me away from the computer entirely and I actually have not turned mine on for the past 3 days, let alone been on it much at all the past 11.  I kept my rules, for the most part.  I went outside every single sunny day, for a good amount of time too.  Because of this, the past few cloudy days have really slowed me down because I feel such a drastic difference without the sun.  I have also reconnected with old friends, and I made two new ones, although I wouldn’t really count them because they are two online acquaintances.  I have mostly kept the house clean.  There are two rooms that require more attention but I still did much better than usual.  I kept on my feet and active most days.  I also had time to think about what my problem was, not just with laziness but with everything in general.  The consensus leads us back to a balance of thinking, feeling, and acting.  I have been made more aware of my reliance upon thinking, to the point where I sometimes do not feel and I almost never act.  I find that I am infinitely happier when I chose to act upon my thoughts, rather than continue thinking.  I also find that, when I do this, I feel more, and can also act upon my feelings.  All three are coming into balance now, and overall I find life to be more fulfilling.  I think the source of this, besides a kick in the butt from losing and then regaining my significant other, is realizing that I need to act on things that must be done, not just things I feel like doing.  Following this has brought me further in my self development.  I also noticed that when I over think things, I don’t really know what I’m talking about when I try to express them.  For this reason I lost my relationship, and for the reason of my seeking balance I have regained it.  Truly, being unbalanced in this way not only affects you but it affects everyone around you.  I am determined to not over think things, to not lose my feelings, and to act on things as I realize they need to be done, or as I realize I want to do them.  I do not want to think so much on something, explore every possible success or failure, to the point where I don’t want to do something I previously wanted to do very badly–or to the point where I balk from something that needs doing.  That is what the second laziness trial showed me.

I gave up making lists for a little while, and at first it was very good.  I just did things rather than thinking about doing them.  Unfortunately, I also forgot some things that needed doing and they slacked behind.  I think that a little longer of list making and getting in a pattern with certain chores is all I need to nix the list entirely and just act on instinct.

To help in this development, since I do not trust myself to keep it on my own, I have enlisted the assistance of a counselor.  I have had one once previously while attending the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, and I found it immensely helpful to have someone to keep track of my goals and how I was progressing toward them.  I plan to use this counselor in the same way, to express my theories, how I am making progress, and what works.  So far I have come to the conclusion of where all my problems were stemming from, and I plan to build upon this conclusion until I have come to a new level in my self-development–preferably being more mature and independent.

I am not going to embark on a second laziness trial.  While I see the virtue in it, I do not see the need.  If I find myself slacking off again I will do so, but I have been doing just fine even when I’ve forgotten I was on the trial in the first place.  There are days I allow myself to just relax, but even so I have bounced back rather effectively.

Lia Cross

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Today I was awoken at 11AM by a call that told me I got the job. That being the case, I had a very energizing start on the day. I got up immediately and fed my dog, as well as cleaned up in the kitchen. I went on to do more chores but lets see what I had planned for the day first.

Must do:

-Cat litter.

-Pet room.

-Clean around house.

-Shower.

-Print volunteer form (and fill out some of it).

-Call relative.

-Call for a couch.

-Blog.

-Research.

Might do:

-Make something for Sunday.

-Exercise.

-Put Gas in the car (or, better yet, convert it to solar! I wish.)

Extra:

-Garden.

-Wash sheets / towels.

-Check email.

Its 3:30 now, and so far I’ve: Cleaned the cat litter and in the pet room, cleaned around the house, called about the couch, showered, printed and filled out the volunteer form, did a little research, gardened, and checked my email. I didn’t call my relative because I saw that her car was gone, and this meant that our plans were canceled anyway because she was at work. I anticipate exercising later. I also anticipate getting a couch, but I’m waiting for the person who owns it to get back to me.

So far I got all my chores done. I would like to do more research though, so I’ll keep that in mind throughout the day if I ever want to sit down and do some mental work. My research has been going somewhat slow but I’m just glad that its going at all. Some is better than none. I can do better, yes, but for now I am satisfied. I suppose thats a lazy person’s perspective but its an improvement from how I was before. Maybe if I continue for another ten days I’ll set limits for how little I can get away with in certain areas.

I’m beginning to notice just how little time it takes to do my chores. My house-mate even showed me a way how to make some of them go faster. I find I can get a lot done that needs to be done, but then I slow down with the other things that I don’t feel are quite as necessary, but are still important (like my research). I’m passionate about it, but when it gets right down to it I find my mental clarity is wanting. A resolve to this would be a raw diet, but for now I’m satisfied sticking with vegan. Raw vegan is the goal, and I’m confident I am working my way there.

More later.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

There wasn’t much that I did the rest of the day.  I never got in contact with the man with the couch, so I didn’t go to get it.  I ate a little, watched some TV, spoke with my father to sort out some things, and found a doctor to go to for a physical I need for a volunteer position.  I’d rather go to a holistic practitioner but I’m fairly certain they won’t accept any evaluation from an alternative doctor.  No worries, though, as its just a physical and I won’t let them push any drugs on me, or vaccines, and hopefully no blood work if the exam doesn’t require it.

I finished absolutely everything I had to do today, but unfortunately almost nothing that I didn’t have to do.  That being said, it seems I am just barely skirting by on this un-lazy challenge rather than pushing myself forward.  I will be satisfied with that for now, but after some things settle down in this new “hectic” lifestyle of mine, I’ll be forced to push myself harder, perhaps for another trial.

So far things are going better than they were before.  That being the case, this trial is thus far a success.  Its not mold-breaking, but it is giving me new insight.

I have not been employing any real strategies to get these results, I just find myself more motivated.  I wake in the morning and get things done, then I have all day to relax. I find that when I feel that I have free time, I am more likely to add responsibilities, such as this new job and volunteering.  Unfortunately I usually push myself too far, too fast in these positions, so I am glad to be taking it slow.

From now on I will not be blogging daily about the trial, since things seem to have neutralized.  I am not using any new strategies and I am not learning anything new.  If I do I will make sure to mention it.  For right now, though, I plan to update on the last day to give an overview of how things went.

Lia Cross 

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