February 27th 2008
Doing what’s right.
Every so often there comes a time when you have to do something you may not like, yet you know that it is the right thing to do. You get knots in your stomach, you feel sick, and even if you want to do it, it still isn’t any easier. Things of this nature may include apologizing to someone you seriously wronged, standing up for someone or something even though the consequences may be dire, such as losing your job, or intervening in someone’s life in such a way that they may hate your guts—but you know that they will be helped for it.
All these situations are difficult, not just because of the possible consequences, but also because we may not always be positive that it is the right thing. For instance, apologizing to that person after the fact—in one case, you don’t stir up the past and thus both parties go on with their lives. In the other, you bring up a hurtful memory but in the spirit of trying to make things right—or at least in trying to show respect and voice your sincerest apologies. The question comes when you consider whether or not the apology is even wanted. Then it becomes a question of: Am I doing this for selfish reasons, or do I really think that I owe it to them?
In the case of possibly losing your job, you may know that the right thing is to stand up for a good cause, but the consequences could be harming yourself and your family, with the strong possibility that nothing will even come of it. What is right? How can we really know?
The third scenario is a little more obvious. To intervene, we would hope, is the right choice. To not do so is already harming the person and, if something really bad happens, you’ll be partially to blame. However, can you live with someone hating you? Can you deal with the pain of wondering if it was really right, really necessary, and whether or not you just made a bad situation worse?
Knowing what’s right isn’t easy, and doing it is even harder. Yet, I encourage everyone to always persevere. Always do what you think is right. If you realize later that its not, then make amends. Don’t just think short-term, but think long-term as well. You probably should apologize, even if it ends up backfiring. They’ll get over it, and so will you. You probably should voice your concerns even if you lose your job, because if that career is leading you down a bad path then you probably don’t want to be there anyway (consider it a chance to re-evaluate your life and career), and not doing anything in the face of “evil” is just as bad as doing harm directly, so you can be sure that intervening with someone is the way to go.
These are so few examples, but I hope they got you thinking about something in your life that you need to do that may not be easy. Either you’re being lazy, or you’re scared, or you feel it is impossible at this moment. Whatever it is, keep trying to always do what’s right.
Lia Cross
